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Wednesday, January 2

Sandra's Kwanzaa Cake

Well, Kwanzaa just wrapped up its week long celebration, but Sandra Lee's Kwanzaa cake is truly timeless:

I think the YouTube commenter "RazzyFoxtrot" puts it best:
sandra lee's kwanzaa cake is FIERCE. y'all bitches just wish you were fabulous enough to jam table candles into a cake and put corn nuts on it.

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At 1/02/2008 10:14 PM , Blogger Kathryn said...

Even seeing it, I don't believe it.

At 1/02/2008 10:34 PM , Anonymous brycer martini said...

Somewhere out there Anthony Bourdain is curled up in the fetal position, whimpering.

At 1/02/2008 11:15 PM , Blogger Prisca said...

I'm rendered speechless.

At 1/02/2008 11:27 PM , Blogger Lunch Buckets said...

there are no words

At 1/02/2008 11:42 PM , Anonymous Cat said...

What a horrifying waste of a one-dollar angel food cake and a 10-cent can of frosting. Thankfully, she was able to dress it with fistfuls of pumpkin seeds and acorns--chocolate cake's best friends.


At 1/03/2008 8:47 AM , Blogger JordanBaker said...

I've said it before, but this woman really must be stopped.

At 1/03/2008 9:11 AM , Anonymous Clutch_fan_74 said...

Someone needs to beat her up side the head with a rolling pin for calling herself a chef, and for passing that thing off as anything that could be remotely construed as baking or even a good attempt at cake decorating for that matter.

At 1/03/2008 1:32 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love how at the end she "can't wait to taste this wonderful cake." It's store bought angel food cake and canned icing, you should know how it's going to taste, you didn't do anything magical.

At 1/03/2008 1:55 PM , Blogger A. Sunshine said...

RazzyFoxtrot is my hero, this cake is heinous!

At 1/03/2008 4:26 PM , Anonymous Jeff said...

At least RazzyFoxtrot got it right calling them "Cornnuts," and not "acorns" as dear, sweet Sandy called them. (Do not chew on this cake with your front teeth...tasty as Cornnuts are, they wreak havoc with your front choppers.) Agreed:
If I hadn't seen it, I wouldn't have believed it.

At 1/04/2008 3:21 AM , Anonymous B-Side said...

haha — thank you for posting that. When I saw the kwanza cake in the TV listings, I almost threw up preemptively.


At 1/04/2008 8:56 PM , Blogger jacob said...

kathryn: believe it. then, try to forget it.

brycer: ehh... i don't have much sympathy for him, but you're right.

prisca: perhaps another bite of apple-pie filled kwanzaa cake with inspire you?

lunch buckets: how about "crazy" and "what the hell?"

cat: yeah, i def. love a few seeds in my cake. not.

jordanbaker: I used to be able to kinda get where she was coming from, but a "recipe" such as this does prove she needs an intervention before we see her rolled in on a gurney to cedars-sanai. oh wait...

clutchfan: i think someone just might.

amy: oh, but she's a magician with store-bought icing! didn't you see that cocoa? ;-)

a. sunshine: yeah, where is the razz? stand up and take a bow.

jeff: yeah, are "cornnuts" a registered trademark? If so, why is "acorn" the next choice? so dumb.

b-side: yeah, it's pretty redick.

At 1/05/2008 1:43 AM , Blogger John said...

Yeah, isn't is sickeningly funny? I posted it too to celebrate the seventh day of Kwanzaa, MST3K-style. I can just picture Mike and the bots in front of the TV screen right now:

"Be delicate with it of course" (0:14)

Don't bitch-slap it like I did the first time.

"...and [add] vanilla, just a teaspoon or two" (0:50)

Or better yet, how about booze?

"Be a little more careful now, where you place that [icing]." (1:47)

or someone could lose an eye.

"And decorating it is such fun. You are going to use some acorns, and some pumpkin seeds..." (2:05)

It's FUN to sprinkle corn nuts on your cake!"

"And I need to taste this wonderful cake." (2:35)

Don't you think you should've done that before you made the cake, Sandy?

I wish Mystery Science Theater was still on. They'd have a field day with Sandra Lee.

At 1/05/2008 5:41 PM , Blogger Lester Hunt said...

I think my brain is bleeding.

At 1/25/2008 2:48 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ouch. Ouch. ouchouchouchouch

I can feel the blood vessels in my brain explode one by one. I didn't like her back in the 90's when she was doing those crazy curtain things and I don't like her now.

It's like paying $3 for a Lipton side. I'd rather pay $.65 for a bag of rice and $1.50 for chicken broth and make my own thing.

At 2/28/2008 10:21 AM , Anonymous chiffonade said...

Shamdra's now infamous Kwanzaa Cake is probably responsible for more racial tension than the Rodney King incident. Lord knows I'd take up the gauntlet if she adorned a bagged angel food cake with canned pie filling and... CORN NUTS in my honor!

At 7/24/2008 11:59 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not gonna lie. I HAVE made AND eaten this cake before, just for shits and giggles. It's amazing. I'm not even joking. The pie filling in the middle was a bit too slick (and a little hard to eat), but DON'T DOUBT ME! TRY IT!

At 12/12/2008 9:33 AM , Blogger Attila the Fun said...

Awww, the video got pulled down from YouTube :-(

At 2/10/2009 7:06 AM , Anonymous Marlon said...

Oh yes! At last a cooking show that makes me feel hungry. I am going to treasure the feeling, because all the other food shows on TV usually makes me feel like a dolt.


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