Tuesday, April 8
I started studying Spanish when I was five, but there are certain things you can only learn while immersed in the culture, as my old Spanish teacher, Señora Horton, would say. And seeing how any pending trips to Spanish-speaking nations are still currently pending, I figured the Starbucks next to a Spanish-speaking embassy would be second-best.
(The scene: two men have just gotten their cappuccinos and are sitting down at the last vacant table in Starbucks.)
Señor 1 (Getting up, dressed in his fashionable slim suit with cuff links and fancy tie): ¿Quieres azúcar?
Señor 2 (dressed equally fashionable): Uhh... sacarina, por favor.
Señor 1: ¿Sacarina amarilla?
Señor 2: Sí.
Me (dressed in old H&M shirt with pants from Express and, what's that, did I spill on myself?): (Thinking: Hmm... "yellow saccahrine?" Splenda!)
So, when you find yourself at the Starbucks next to the Embassy of Uruguay, or the next time Paula Deen makes her Magical Peanut Butter Cookies with "sugar replacement", or the next time you really are in a Spanish-speaking country (go to a real cafe there, though), don't ask for Splenda, ask for sacarina amarilla!*
*Also keep in mind that everyone will probably already know what Splenda is if you say that instead of sacarina amarilla, in which case this mini Spanish lesson is pointless.