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Friday, March 13

Paula Deen Repeats the Dirty Joke She Did on Conan

Upon walking in to Paula's Poker Party down in South Beach, I thought, "Wow! Paula's working the gambling tables! And what's up with her hair?!"



Wasn't her, sadly. Although when she came out onstage the hair did look pretty similar.



Someone in the comments reminded me about the dirty joke I got recorded Paula Deen saying that I promised to post. Sorry for the delay! I checked out the audio on my video and it just isn't that good, sadly. I'll have to write it out instead.

I didn't see it, but evidently Paula whispered this to Conan O'Brian when she was a guest on his show.

And since it's so dirty, you'll have to highlight the area below if you want to see it:


- What's the difference between a nice girl and a good girl?
- A nice girl will help you stick it in, a good girl won't do it at all.


While not as funny as the one she told last year, Paula definitely got more "dirty" points this year. In fact, instead of a burst of laughter there was more like a reaction of shock and some polite chuckles.

Oh Pauler.

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73 Comments:

At 3/13/2009 10:45 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

This pig will never go away as long as there are idiots who will pay money to get a glimpse of her and buy her products ... I'm surprised that she didn't take a dump on one of the gaming tables like she did in her driveway ... Even if she did her damn moron groupies would just laugh about it and say " Oh that's just Paula being Paula ! " ... SAD...

 
At 3/13/2009 10:49 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's a pretty tame joke. The one she told last year was "dirtier," because she actually used the word -- gasp! -- "dick." But whatever. It's not about language or low-end humor. It's about the fact that this hillbilly doesn't have the common sense to know she represents the Food Network. And it's obviously innappropriate for her to say things like this. She is just a vile, crude woman. I can't stand her or her food and she's starting to symbolize everything that's wrong with the Network.

 
At 3/13/2009 11:11 AM , Blogger Susan said...

She has problems. The average person wouldn't be telling those jokes in private, let alone in public. FN needs to get rid of her.

 
At 3/13/2009 11:21 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

FN will never get rid of this pig because she has this big following who are enchanted with her no matter how stupid she acts ... She's a cash cow & that's all FN cares about ... MONEY AND RATINGS... GREED...!

 
At 3/13/2009 11:38 AM , Anonymous Gen said...

It's official. Paula Deen is disgusting.

 
At 3/13/2009 11:55 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I used to love this sweet old Southern lady. She seemed like the grandma everybody wished they had when they were growing up. Now she's like the crazy great aunt everyone wishes would stay up in the attic.

I feel like I need to shower after I hear her filthy mouth/dirty comments on Paula's party, especially when aimed at much younger men (the teenager from Ugly Betty?? He's probably still having nightmares.)

 
At 3/13/2009 11:55 AM , Blogger Ashlee said...

I saw Paula Mouthing this to Conan. She has confirmed my obvious suspicions. The woman is class-less.

 
At 3/13/2009 12:11 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let's all clutch our pearls...

 
At 3/13/2009 1:03 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

The more the followers, the more money she makes and I believe she would do anything to keep that going. Her behavior is disgusting in all aspects!!!!!

My question is, are her sons the same way? Where was Bobby when this was going on, someone reported he was doing a great deal of drinking. One can only imagine why!!!

 
At 3/13/2009 1:12 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's not even funny!

 
At 3/13/2009 1:36 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Paula Deen does not represent the Food Network. She represents herself. She's bigger than Foodtv now. She's made the network millions upon millions of dollars, and frankly, she act any damn way she pleases. She's a fun loving and warm woman. She is not a cartoon or a "vile pig" as one person called her. She's so funny that if you met her in real life, you would be charmed too. Plus I know from experience that Paula can cook most of the "chefs" on foodtv under the table. Let her be.

 
At 3/13/2009 1:50 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's more than cooking she's doing under the table..LOL.

These comments are not related to her cooking. She has some good recipes but I can no longer watch her show because she's a hag.

 
At 3/13/2009 1:52 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Let her be" boo hoo. That's not what she wants. Chill. It's only a website....Pauler would agree I'm sure. She likes being a dirty ole woman...

 
At 3/13/2009 2:21 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

She has a large following, but what type of people follow her? What type of person would see her as a role model? Are these people really that desperate!!

 
At 3/13/2009 2:29 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon. 1:36...It's idiotic followers like you who keep the Deen Train Wreck going ... You must also be amused by obnoxious bratty kids who keep doing the same things because people laugh at them and give them attention... No taste...

 
At 3/13/2009 2:47 PM , Blogger Lana said...

Offended by a joke about "sticking it in?" Really?!? I mean c'mon, really?? I've heard worse at a church bake sale.

 
At 3/13/2009 2:48 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon 1:36 Paula is not that great of a cook! I made the mistake of going to the Lady and Sons on a recent trip to Savannah. She gets her favor from salt, lots and lots of salt!!!! She uses can vegetables, most great cooks use fresh!!! If you like grease, then this is the place for you. There are many fine places to eat in Savannah, unfortunately, the Lady and Sons isn't one of them.

 
At 3/13/2009 2:59 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lana ... You won't hear that kind of joke at ANY southern church bake sale ... I've been a born & bred southerner from the deep South all of my many years and believe me you DON'T hear that mess out of any of the " LADIES " mouths ... NOTE : I said LADIES ... Paula Deen is no lady .

 
At 3/13/2009 3:45 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm hardly a prude so I like a dirty joke now and then -- at the right time and in the right setting and even one being told by a 62-year old grandma. But, I don't think that being in front of hundreds of people at SOBE or in front of millions of people on Conan is the proper place for that kind of joke no matter what your age is. Tasteless, tacky, and juvenile.

Pauler's following is like a cult. If you have ever checked out the forums on her website, it's nothing but a fanatical love fest for the woman. So she definitely appeals to a certain segment of society. Wouldn't quite know how to label them, though.

 
At 3/13/2009 3:52 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

They're NEEDY ... Very NEEDY... For them Paula Deen provides some fantasy ... SAD.

 
At 3/13/2009 4:29 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

As long as the money keeps coming in, she will keep up showing the world a type of southern that southern ladies are not.

As for her family, especially her sons, you would think they would be embarrassed by her behavior. When her grandson gets older, what will he think of her when he reads her book and sees how she acts. What about Brooke, you never see her on her shows or in pictures, you only hear about her from Jamie. I wonder what she thinks of Paula, let alone what she thinks of the impression Paula is giving Jack.

 
At 3/13/2009 4:40 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonder what Brooke's parents think... On " The View " recently Paula Deen said that her grandson Jack wouldn't have anything to do with her ... Well ... That says a lot . A two year old sometimes has very good taste in people ... Besides , no one in her family will ever say anything to correct her because they're all dependent on her being the family " cash cow "... What Mama says goes & so goes the money ...

 
At 3/13/2009 6:44 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have got to be kidding me.

THAT is a "dirty" joke???

You hear stronger stuff on Comedy Central during prime time.

People need to quit being so prudishly uptight.

 
At 3/13/2009 6:44 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have got to be kidding me.

THAT is a "dirty" joke???

You hear stronger stuff on Comedy Central during prime time.

People need to quit being so prudishly uptight.

 
At 3/13/2009 6:57 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon 2;59, thanks for the lesson on southern church bake sale culture. I see now that ladies in the south are good girls. The rest of us up north are nice.

 
At 3/13/2009 7:35 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

No Anon. 2:59...We always say to pity poor Northerners they weren't born Southern and they don't know any better ... But , Paula Deen does know better and she plays up to you idiots to the hilt because you eat her up... We know better...

 
At 3/13/2009 8:36 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

1:36 you are just a sad sad 'person'.

 
At 3/13/2009 8:47 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

AMEN !

 
At 3/13/2009 10:12 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jacob PLEASE!!!
Nothing newsworthy? Is there nothing else to get these same old people with their same old comments riled up about?

 
At 3/13/2009 10:27 PM , Anonymous Stacy said...

Hey Anon.10:12... Not all of us are " old folks " ...Paula Deen is an old fart who gags me...

 
At 3/14/2009 11:18 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey ding dong Stacy..the person wasnt referring to "old folks". I think it was meant as "same old, same old"(?)and I couldn't agree more!

 
At 3/14/2009 12:47 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey asshole if you don't like it go ram your head up Paula Deen's ass or go to her website forums and join in the " Paula Deen Is My Idol " love fest...

 
At 3/14/2009 3:12 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Off your anger meds today?

 
At 3/14/2009 3:24 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon 3:12... Drinking your Deen Kool-Aid today ... Your a chump so you must have guzzled gallons by now...

 
At 3/14/2009 4:45 PM , Anonymous Lee said...

Paula Deen is Savannah's answer to Bernie Madoff ... Greedy bitch who'd do anything for a buck ... And , she cheats at business too ... The Nitches, LLC is suing her punkin ass and her business for double-dealing behind their backs ... What goes around comes around Deens ... Maybe that 15 minutes of yours is ticking down ......

 
At 3/14/2009 5:08 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Take her or leave her for every post that mentioned "GREED" -go get your MBA Earn a living! Earn an income Don't vote to be taken care of .

 
At 3/14/2009 8:52 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You mouth breather ... There's a difference in making a decent living and cheating a company with which you are under exclusive contract ...Go graduate high school & shut up.

 
At 3/14/2009 10:13 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love how some of the people writing in the comments are so shocked and offended by Paula's joke but in the same sentence can call her vile and disgusting. News flash people: your completely fake reaction is totally transparent for a) your disdain for overweight people and b) your dislike of people who are Southern and having fun.

Get a grip!

 
At 3/14/2009 10:31 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an idiot you are ! The remarks from me have NOTHING to do with " a dislike for overweight people " or " dislike for Southern people having fun " ... I'm Southern born & bred , overweight , & honey we KNOW how to have fun and Paula Deen's brand of " FUN " doesn't represent all of us ( just the shameless white trashy ones ) ... Get your facts straight you moron ... Or , go get yourself in the Deen Moonie mood by drinking another gallon or two of Deen Kool-Aid ...

 
At 3/14/2009 11:39 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL to Anon at 10:31PM!!! Is it just me or do people who say they're Southern born & bred get really offended by someone famous from the South when they're really just mad about being fat?

 
At 3/15/2009 12:10 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

No doofus ... We get mad when dumbass Yankees think that Paula Deen is " a real Southern lady " ... You people are the idiots who come down here and stand in line at her restaurant for two hours in mid-day summer sun with cowbells around your necks waiting for your bells to go off ... You idiots are to be pitied not because you are merely stupid , but because you're SO ignorant ... Believe me we know more about ill-mannered , loud mouthed & tacky Yankees than you idiots will ever understand about us ... Paula Deen is a trashy clown who is egged on by fools like you ... Maybe when she includes a full view sex show in her act you'd think that she was just a sweet little old Southern bell havin' a lil' fun ... Morons..And , to think you neanderthals are breeding hand over fist ...

 
At 3/15/2009 12:25 AM , Anonymous Margie said...

Don't waste your breath Anon 12:10 . They're not born here and they don't understand . Most importantly , they have hideous taste or they're mentally challenged if they're amused by Paula Deen . Or , they're white trash like she is . Whatever the reason trying to argue with them is like throwing pearls before swine .

 
At 3/15/2009 4:25 AM , Anonymous Tony said...

God yeah Margie . Savannah is my home base . I've been to her place a couple of times . Now I love down home food of the south and hers is standard not great . The customers though are mostly tourists that travel from out of town .Let me tell you they are nuts , especilally the hard core female Paula fans who swoon at the sight of the life size cardboard stand up photo of her that they have there . They are wack jobs !

 
At 3/15/2009 8:55 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, as a Northerner, I don't like 12:10's statement that we're all "ill-mannered, loud mouthed & tacky Yankees". Some of us were brought up to be polite and respectful. We are not all eager to kneel down and kiss Paula's feet! Anyone who would stand in line for hours to eat at her restaurant is just plain nuts! And I'm pretty sure if you check you'll find that they are not ALL from north of the Mason-Dixon line.

And, just so you know, I don't think Paula Deen is the epitome of "a real Southern Lady". Just the opposite; I think she giving the fine ladies in the South a bad rap!

 
At 3/15/2009 9:13 AM , Anonymous Callie said...

You are absolutely right ... Thank you so much ... Paula Deen is just painfully embarrassing to so many of us Southern people .

 
At 3/15/2009 9:38 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have to wait in line with a cow bell around your neck?!?

 
At 3/15/2009 10:29 AM , Anonymous Tony said...

yeah a cow bell ...

 
At 3/15/2009 11:47 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Again, I think the main point is that some of you are just mad about being fat and it pains you that you actually have a lot in common with Paula (except for the success and the product lines and the cookbooks... ).

 
At 3/15/2009 12:19 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

And again , Anon . 11:47 , you're an idiot ... Don't get mad at the fact that you're an idiot embrace it...

 
At 3/15/2009 1:14 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon 11:47--- if the people here actually had a lot in common with Paula-the comments section would look more like this---

"Y'all, That joke was so Heeelarious! I shat in my pants!*

 
At 3/15/2009 1:16 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's sad how many people follow her, she is not a lady, she is greedy, she is out for herself, etc, etc,. Due to the fact that she is from the South, puts a bad light on true Southern women, most of whom are not like her at all!!

What is even more sad, just because someone has a different opinion of her they are being attacked. Name calling does not belong here, unless you feel you have to lower yourself to Paula's level.

 
At 3/15/2009 1:24 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

YeeeeeeHaaaawwww Y'AAAAALLLLLLLL !!! I took another shit in my driveway !!!!! Ain't Aah th' cutest thang yew ever saw in yore hol dam life ?????
Duh Huh Duh Huh Duh Huh...

 
At 3/15/2009 2:17 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

From Jamie Deen's blog ...Mama's pants fell down ... It won't be the last time ... Yeah ... We're really mad because we're just like Ol' Paula ... She's famous and we're not ... We're just jealous ... Yes , I've always aspired to dropping my drawers in front of hundreds of people and defecating in the great outdoors on the concrete of my driveway ...RIIIIIGGGHHT .....

 
At 3/15/2009 3:48 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

And this is why some Southern people get a bad rap: "in front of hundreds of people and defecating in the great outdoors on the concrete driveway."

First of all, it's a dirt driveway.

Second, is it just me or is not all that high class to pull out the yee-haws and the defecation when criticizing others?

 
At 3/15/2009 4:03 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Merely describing your god & mentor Paula " Ain't Ya Proud O' Me " Deen ..... I maintain that you insist on being a spectacle you should be treated like a spectacle ... If you don't like it go to her website and join in the praise , glory & worship sessions on her forums ...

 
At 3/15/2009 10:32 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

All y'all are so sad. Southern people get so insecure when they see an old bawdy girl like Paula get a little time in the public eye because they think anyone who comes from the South must be representing them. Who we see on TV doesn't dictate who we are or represent all of us. Those of us from the South actually know that!

 
At 3/16/2009 4:27 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well I'm actually from the South and you have completely missed the point ... Can it just be possible that a person can dislike an entertainer because they have become so flagrantly obnoxious ?
I not a fan of Don Rickles and he's not a drop in the bucket to Paula Deen...

 
At 3/16/2009 4:50 AM , Anonymous Tony said...

Paula Deen is more like Jerry Springer or the guests on his show . I don't like any of them either .

 
At 3/16/2009 9:18 AM , Anonymous Nancy said...

As a young Southern woman , if the highest aspiration that I could hope for was to be like Paula Deen I would be devastated . She is not a person that should be placed on a pedestal and emulated . That's just ridiculous .

 
At 3/16/2009 11:47 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I totally agree!!!!!!!!!

 
At 3/16/2009 2:20 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

blah, blah, blah............

 
At 3/16/2009 2:33 PM , Anonymous Stan said...

Paula Deen = Very Negative Southern Stereotype . Southerners have more often than not been portrayed as ignorant rednecks who are loud and ill-mannered . This woman is the epitome of such a stereotype . And , with her heightened exposure , she has gotten more obnoxious and down right dirty . What the Deen fans keep insisting as jealousy among other Southerners towards the Deens is a profound resentment of her cashing in on such an unfair representation of the South.

 
At 3/16/2009 8:57 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL Stan! "Down right dirty." It's just awful, isn't it? These threatening and crass jokes put us all at risk of having a good time and enjoying ourselves. Why can't she just channel the Lawrence Welk show and bore us to death. I suppose it would be nice if Paula walked out with a stack of bibles and prayer cards and expressed some good values for once because what we really need right now is to cleanse ourselves from the stain of this filthy stereotype.

 
At 3/16/2009 9:19 PM , Anonymous Stan said...

You are an incredibly ignorant and you obviously have little comprehension of the written English language because you completely misunderstood the meaning of my post . I doubt that the Deen naysayers are prudish people . They are something that you are not . People who have the good taste not to be amused by the common and trashy schtick that Ms. Deen insists on delivering .

 
At 3/16/2009 9:41 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man these Deen groupies are blithering idiots . I think that they're like the fools who follow the TV evangelists . When they find out that the object of their adoration is dirt they can't admit it because doing so would let the world know how stupid they are to worship persons of that kind .

 
At 3/17/2009 2:33 PM , Anonymous Anna said...

I used to really be a fan . Then she got famous and got weird and out of control . I can't stand to look at her anymore and don't .

 
At 3/17/2009 5:40 PM , Anonymous Sarah said...

Me too . I think that she ought to join the Grand Ole Opry as a comedienne if she wants to hype up the exaggerated Southern stereotype. But , they're a family type show and she couldn't get away with being dirty . Though , I don't think that she can be funny without venturing on the coarse side .

 
At 3/17/2009 5:43 PM , Anonymous Stan said...

I don't think she could stand the restrictions of The Grand Ole Opry . She LOVES the shock value . She's quite an old exhibitionist !

 
At 3/19/2009 2:23 PM , Blogger Tennisluver said...

I woke up this morning and found a pile of poop in my driveway....it made me think of Paula.

 
At 3/20/2009 10:51 AM , Anonymous Stan said...

Tennisluver that is dead on Deen ! LOL

 
At 3/23/2009 11:48 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I heard something new about some transvestite tug boat captain. What's that all about?

 
At 5/17/2009 11:57 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

That friggin' fugly old cow is a waste of oxygen, and so is her whole family. Food Network must be run by "Raytarded" cockroaches.

 
At 9/14/2011 9:04 PM , Anonymous SavannahBornAndRaised said...

Take this from a Savannah Native. DON'T waste your hard earned money on Her Restaurant. We have SO MANY Wonderful eating establishments here in town that are WAY over and above her Greasy Tourist Trap.
P.S. She makes true Southern Ladies shutter with horror when we think of her being from our beautiful city.

 

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